I forgot to organise a Feline Friday this week, so here is a picture I took last week of one of my Dad’s two kittens. I forget what his real name is and, much to the bemusement of my Dad, have chosen to call him Human (and refuse to acknowledge any other name, to the point where my Dad and Sister are also forced into calling him Human). I have done this because I think the kitty thinks he is a human (his full name is Human Flesh).
Human is a replacement kitty, brought in to replace my seventeen year old cat who died last year. Obviously, this is an impossible task – my cat who died was The Greatest Feline Of All Time, in which every day with him was like Feline Friday. I think there is a word for the psychology behind disliking a replacement; whatever that word is – I got that. I found Human and his brother to be poor replacements to The Greatest Feline Of All Time and thus we got off on a rocky start. While I found Human to be beautiful, I criticized him for his lack of personality and inability to fill The Greatest Feline Of All Time’s metaphorical shoes. My family insisted he was just a kitten and I shouldn’t be so hard on him.
Several months passed and on my last visit home I finally forged a connection with Human. Human is obsessed with shoulders – he won’t sit on your lap; he will sit on your shoulder. And he’s specific about which shoulder too – always the right one. Never the left. This quirk endeared me to Human as I discovered I could pluck him from whatever he may be doing, place him on my lap, and watch him migrate to my right shoulder and curl up into a ball.
I also believe Human may be the reincarnation of a wonderful cat I once knew called Forehead. Forehead lived near my Nan’s house and had a giant forehead. He would visit us for hours and was a big fan of Mr Peter’s Chinese takeaway.
So, he may not be The Greatest Feline Of All Time, but he’s a pretty sweet Human.
With their new album Heaven due for release 4th June, The Walkmen have just announced news of an intimate London headline show at the Village Underground the following week to celebrate the occasion. The band will then be return in August as one of the headline acts at this year’s Green Man Festival in Wales.
Tuesday 12 June – London – Village Underground (£20)
Sunday 19 August – Powys – Green Man Festival
Ticket for the Village Underground show will go on-sale at 9am tomorrow morning (Friday 13th April).